2 things I did this week that got me (warranted)...
1) Went to a neighborhood tennis/basketball court to try out my new skates… with my DOG in tow. Right after I started rolling around, 4 actual tennis players came to play a game of doubles. Guy looks at me, I smile, he looks at dog, dirty look. 2) My mom called while I was waiting in line to get my cell phone plan changed. I told her I’d hang up when it was my turn, but I was too...
Me: I'm going into the Gap, see you in there.
Simon: Nik wants to know why you call it The Gap.
Me: Ummmm, because that's what it's called.
Simon: No it's not, it's called Gap.
Me: No, it's THE gap, look at the sign on the wind... Oh. OH. So you just say, I'm going to Gap?
Simon and Nik: Yes.
Me: My mind was blown when I looked at the logo and it didn't have "the" in it.
Simon and NIk: Want to go to The Sephora? Want to go to The Ralph Lauren? Want to go to The Puma?
…I find a naturalistic understanding of human nature to be indispensable...– - Steve Pinker Just reading through Pinker’s AMA and I love his response to a person who asked him if he thought his understanding of the human mind negatively affects his own happiness. How meaningful and intelligent and perfect.
I am the maximum amount of stressed, and I think 95% of that stress is caused by the fact I’m stressed. Like, I had an unnaturally high stress reaction due to work things that weren’t even that stressful so now I’m stressed that I’m stressed. Because the last period of high-stress I faced made me break out horribly. It’s like when you try to force yourself to fall...
Video footage of that fox I instagramed a couple of weeks ago.
New Year's Resolutions! Yaaaaaaaaaaay...
Have you seen Very Mary Kate? Then you know exactly how that “Yaaaaaaaaaaay…” was meant to be read. If you have not, here’s my favorite one. She doesn’t say the “Yaaaaaaaaaaay…” in it, sorry. It’s one of those things that I thought was a 6 on the ten-point funny scale, but then when I showed it to Simon it got bumped up to a 10 because I...
Simon had Thursday off for Eid al-Adha so he and I and our friend Kirsten went camping. On the way to pick Kirsten up I lectured Simon on how not to make Kirsten feel like a third wheel (no bickering! no talking about stuff only we know about! no grabbing my butt!) and, I think to annoy me, he started bickering with me as soon as she got in the car. When we stopped for food, I told Kirsten...
This was in my drafts from I don't even know how...
I have this idea for a website that helps the forgetful and selfish and just plain busy people remember to be thoughtful. Basically you would sign up for a free account and then add all the people you care about (and those you’re required to suck-up to?) and the website (and of course there would be an app, duh) would remind you to do thoughtful things for each person at different intervals....
This is going to be longwinded. [[MORE]] I wasn’t going to do a blog post about the current state of my relationship, but then I realized how happy I am that I have 4 Years and 3 Years posts to look back on. I guess this could count as my 2 Years post… and all I posted on our first anniversary was this, but if I squint my eyes real tight-like I can see why that was relevant to my...
If I were to write it, “Summer 2012, Part 2” would be a lot about how we celebrated the 4th of July. It would include: notes on Simon’s first stateside 4th of July celebration (he bought a lot of fireworks and enjoyed setting them off. I would have happily spent that money at the Kate Spade outlet, but that’s the difference between boys and girls) an embarrassing...
Simon and I are making an offer on a house today. To celebrate all the scanning and emailing I did this morning, I edited a picture of our maybe house with various effects. We looked at a few houses while we were in Florida. It turns out that one of my closest friends, Kristen, whom I met on the first day of high school (and have remained consistently in touch with for the last almost-13...
Summer 2012, Part 1
Simon and I were up until 1:30am packing and cleaning the house and drinking the Thank You For Watching The Cat beers that we bought for our cat-sitting friend. With her. I mean, we drank them WITH her. In celebration of her kindness and inability to turn down a favor. Because vacation starts when you get home from your last day of work! I have never put less effort into packing before. I...
Happy 24th Birthday, Natalie!
Natalie is my oldest younger sister. Today, she turns 24. Here we are as kids. Isn’t she so cute? (And didn’t I look like a boy? Aww.) Natalie loves (like, CRAZY loves) animals. (Our late dog Emma, the sweetheart.) Natalie is a comedienne and has great acting and singing skills, too. Here she is after a performance of “The Littlest Angel” that she starred...
So Much Stuff to Say
Sorry for only ever blogging about my dog anymore. She’s been getting on my nerves lately. You know, because she just decides she’s NOT WALKING ANYMORE when I’m literally standing in the middle of a two-lane road trying to cross the street with her. I was moody and was all “Beesly, come on. Please. You do this everyday. Quit being such a baby. Ugh.” She has...
Keep in mind she was all wet from swimming, and that she had to go back in my brand new, real clean vehicle after this. Gross.
Dubai man wins record for fastest beep at green... →
DUBAI: A Dubai resident was in tears of joy yesterday after claiming his second Guinness World Record in just three years. Walid Ali, a 36-year-old Emirati, snatched the record for ‘Quickest Car Horn Beep at a Green Light,’ at approximately 7.42pm last night, honking a mere 0.00002 seconds after the traffic light had changed from red to green at a crossroads on Al Wasl road. Unbeknownst to Ali,...
This Week So Far
I have several of those coffee mugs with the hole-y lids, so you can drink from any edge of the mug, which is very convenient. It also means that I can fill the mug right up, and put the lid on without coffee overflow. Yesterday morning, I forgot to put the lid on the mug. I didn’t notice until a few minutes after I started driving to work when I had to brake and hot coffee slopped...
I went to a housewarming/birthday party in the Burj Khalifa earlier this year. Just imagine me singing the dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dooo-doo-doo Mission Impossible theme music every time I took a picture. Because I was. The apartment wasn’t furnished yet. Happy housewarming Tariq! Although I think it ended up being more of a housetrashing. I did what I could to...
Simon and I seem to win a lot of radio contests here in Dubai. Here we are enjoying a free steak dinner at The Address Montgomerie Dubai in January: I won that there steak dinner by correctly answering “What do [somepercentage] of women do before a first date?” Answer: Google their date. (Fine print: beer is not included.) Last month, Simon went shooting at Jebel Ali...
Yesterday I asked Simon to lock the door so I could make sure my new key works. It didn’t work at first. I struggled for a bit trying to turn it in the lock. Then I gave up and knocked a frustrated knock. Simon opened the door… He was laughing a whole lot. Turns out, you see, he was holding the lock closed while I tried to unlock the door and watching my frustration via the...
A white Lexus (Abu Dhabi number plate Red 4 19905) driver today rode my ass and flashed me over and over again (although I could barely tell he was flashing his lights because his lights could not be seen in my rearview mirror), then passed me on the right. When he did this, he swerved aggressively towards my car in a threatening manner… and got flashed by a speed camera at the same...
Last month, Simon and I signed up to participate in a desert cleanup in Ras al-Khaimah with Almost 4x4, an off-roading group that we had yet to meet. It seemed like no big deal, just a couple dozen SUV owners meeting in a parking lot then driving into the desert and picking up some trash. We planned to spend a few hours volunteering, eat dinner with the other cleaners, then go camping. Before...
Lebanese Guys Keep Calling Me a Redneck
Lebanese Guys: Something something you're a redneck.
Lebanese Guys: Something something redneck redneck
Me: "LOOK, just because I'm AMERICAN doesn't mean I'm a redneck."
Lebanese Guys: *Muttering*
Me: "Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh! My neck is red from coloring my hair. Sorry, I thought you were calling me a hick."
Lebanese Guys: "Hick?"
The post I wrote the other day has led to some back and forth commenting on dogs in Dubai and I was reminded of something that happened a couple of weeks ago… I was walking Beesly in the desert area across from where I live. Well, I was walking and she was off her leash chasing pieces of garbage that were rolling in the wind and generally frolicking around as dogs do. I usually don’t see any...
Cultural-Differences-Induced Hurt Feelings
I get stared at when I walk Beesly. Every time I walk Beesly. Most of the time I try to respect the different cultural views about dogs and be as understanding as I can that some people are going to dislike my dog. Some people are going to fear my dog. And some people are going to be disgusted by my dog. Simon told me that he was walking Beesly the other day and when he walked out the door, a...
Last April I ordered myself 4 pairs of Havaianas online, then returned them because I was a doofus and ordered the wrong size. (Doofus??) While I was waiting on the refund I placed the order again (this time ordering the correct size) and asked some friends and some fellow Tumblrs (hi Gubbi and Michelle and also Lindsay even though I don’t think you ordered any Havaianas!) if they’d...
Yesterday I called my apartment maintenance peeps because none of the lights in one bedroom were turning on. I texted Simon about this bizarre problem and he reminded me that the day before was the day he decided we “needed” a dimmer switch in the living room and then “installed” or “wired” said dimmer switch… So maybe that was the problem? It was the...
I’m not sure if you and I have talked about the resemblance, but the resemblance has definitely been discussed… No offense taken either- she acts like that retarded dog plenty! The other day I watched her walk up to the cat, who was resting on the sofa. The cat immediately started smacking Beesly on the nose over and over again with her paw and Beesly just stood there and...